Siblings

Adoption of Siblings
A key issue in the matching process for many waiting
children is that they are to be adopted as a sibling group.
Especially when children have lost their parents due to
abuse or neglect, maintaining the sibling relationship is a
priority criterion when considering potential adoptive
families. Matching for these children involves finding a
family with whom all the children can be placed together.
In some cases, however, families may express interest
in some but not all siblings. A family, for example, may
be interested in adopting three of five siblings and may be open to meaningful contact with a
family who is interested in adopting the remaining two siblings. Should either family be encouraged
to stretch and adopt all five children?
Should each family’s preference be honored and
the sibling group be adopted by two families?
Or should the families not be approved to adopt
any of the children, a decision that means that
all of the siblings lose the opportunity for an
adoptive family? In such situations, it is important
to explore a family’s rationale for wishing
to adopt only certain children in the sibling
group. In some cases, the barriers may be
resolvable, such as when the family’s decision is
based on financial considerations and adoption
assistance can be arranged.
Although it may not always be feasible, caseworkers
should begin with the assumption that all siblings should be adopted by the same family. Both research and experience have proven the
importance of keeping siblings together in one family unless there are extenuating circumstances
that indicate that it is not in a child’s best
interest. In addition, practice has shown that
many families who intend to keep close relationships
between separated siblings do not, in
reality, do so over time. Caseworkers need to
take into account sibling relationships from
the child’s perspective, whether the relationships
are “of blood” or “of the heart.”
Although shared genetics are important and
provide a compelling reason for keeping siblings
together, existing emotional relationships
between children also need to be acknowledged
and preserved.